I feel like I've cut myself out of some pretty cool things in life. You'd think I'd change... But, I really think I missed out in Norfolk. Granted I miss Norfolk horribly. It was such a good time in my life. But, It could have been so much better. All I needed to do was try to not hold myself back so much. I think people are afraid of getting hurt or rejected by others so they don't put themselves out there. When now that I look back, I just missed out on being friends with some really amazing people. I feel like I knew them... but I could have really enjoyed them. Such a sad scenario. And it's all because I didn't reach out when another did, or try to get myself into their lives. I think most of the time people like friends, so why was I so scared to be one?? I wonder if I should still try, via blogger or facebook to get close to these ladies from Virginia. But, maybe it's too late. I don't know.
So, I remember leaving Virginia and going to Denver and realizing this. Even as I was spending my last days in Virginia I couldn't reach out and become closer, silly me. So I went into Denver thinking, I might have a really great friend here. And I found four. Plus a whole crowd that I'm still getting to know. I was so boosted and uplifted and helped by these wonderful women. Friends are so important and gosh I'm so sad I've missed out. So... As I'm moving into another ward where it would be soooo easy to hide and think "They don't want to be my friend" I'm just going to give it a good head held high and smile.
P.s. if you are one of the ladies I'm talking about I just think ya'll are amazing and I love to learn from you.
Christmas Day - 2015
8 years ago
Four years later, I am still trying to find friends in my ward! You can do it, you are starting out with a great attitude.
ReplyDeleteMake sure to let us know when you have a plan for Disney, we would love to see you/maybe go too!
Marie - I am so sorry I didn't get to reach out as much either. I think in a lot of ways I felt like you did. Not sure if I was one of the people you would have liked to know better, but I love hearing about your family and you from your blog entries. I am on facebook as well. I miss you!! It would have been great to train for a triathlon together!
ReplyDeleteOh Marie, I LOVE ya! And oh, how I have missed you out here. You were a great friend to me, so don't worry about that at all, but I do share your feelings of the hardness of making friends as a mom. I feel like you play the same games you did when you were dating. . .not wanting to call too much, if you called last time then it's "their" turn, or you don't want to seem to eager or desperate. I think the thing I have learned is that everyone is in the same boat as you even if they don't let on--we all get lonely and long for that connection. I just wish our time together hadn't been so short. Even after almost 5 years out here now, I still feel that I have not made those close connections I wish I had. I have thought of you every time I hit a Kohl's sale and wished you could come hang out. I always knew you were the one I could call who would be up for anything. So thanks for being there for me for those 2 years. . .there has been an empty spot since you left. I hope your new ward treats you well, and if not, maybe we'll be coming that way ourselves this summer! LOVE YA!! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteLove you Marie. I am so glad you made good friends in Denver. I miss you! I loved having you as such an inspiration, and a listener for me. I'm really sorry that you feel like you held back here, and I am glad that I have had the opportunity to know you. I look forward to hearing more about your future adventures, and wish you the best of luck in your move!
ReplyDeleteHeather and Kristen I'm so glad I was ya'll's friend, I still am. I remember running with you and Tamara, Kristen, and it was so fun to just talk with ya'll. I miss the Heines bbq's. Heather I think about Kohl's and you all the time. Every time I go there to be precise. I wish that we could have done more this winter also. i think I was just being a hermit. But... If you come out in the summer it would be a blast. Would you be moving to Utah for residency?
ReplyDeleteTwo years did go by so fast. I still feel like my heads spinning and I've been gone for half the amount of time I was there. I understand Heather about the "dating" game when it comes to having friends. You don't want to seem one way too much or another way too much. It's silly. But.. I think I will try and change. I think I need more in my life to do. I know that sounds silly but I think I do better with more responsibility. I wouldn't be slacking in the other areas I do now If I did more with other people and for other people. I think that was a big part of it. I was afraid of doing things for others. How Silly is that? Pretty silly if you ask me.
Thanks Ya'll!! You have no idea what it means. You are the best!
I have felt the same way, it takes putting yourself out there to make a friendship and sometimes that is hard for me too. But you are amazing, look at our friendship, I miss joking with you!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree Marie. I know when I came here I was kind of waiting for someone to step out and not just welcome me to the area but more pull me into a friendship. Never happened so I did it instead. I have made 5 really good friends and many more friends whom I love but not as close. It was amazing how when I stretched out a little, everyone seemed to do the same.
ReplyDeleteplease move back to denver. then, when i move there, i will have a friend.
ReplyDeleteBrooke when are you moving to Denver? Do you plan on being there for a long time? Chances are we will be back there eventually. What part are ya'll thinking of moving to?
ReplyDeleteMarie...I think the world of you! I completely understand those feelings you described as I have had them many times myself. I would have loved to have hung out with you more than I did, and have had the chance to become better friends. I feel a similar way about several people and have no excuse, we lived there for so long...and now as we've moved here I find myself struggling to open up to people here, people who have clearly put themselves out there and I don't know why. I'd love to get caught up on your cute family, so if you are ever coming through, please let us know, we'd love see you. How is that sweet Lauren of yours? I'm sure she's so big now.
ReplyDelete-Jenna Vaughan
Jenna I'll have to get your phone # because we definitely will be down there for some time Memorial Day weekend. But.. that is kinda a hard time to catch people. I don't know maybe we will spontaneously zip on down to warm weather. I totally have spring fever. And it would be so fun to catch up with ya'll. It's amazing how much a family grows in a year and a half.
ReplyDelete