Friday, December 31, 2010

Can I borrow some?!?

Seriously ladies! Where do you get the time?!? I feel like my nose is above water if I get the dishes done by bedtime. :D I think a lot about a desperate house wives episode ( I have watched like five episodes) that I saw before I had Lauren, and the mother of five was exhausted and couldn't understand how moms were 'doing it all' and found out they were taking ridlin from the black market!! Ha! Somehow this gives me a tad amount of peace because it suggests maybe I'm normal because I can't do it all.

Friday, September 24, 2010

A lot of Lasts before A lot of Firsts

Today I am overwhelmed. There is so much to be done before little baby boy comes. But I am also catching myself thinking every time Lauren has a fit, or cuddles or is sleeping or is getting dressed or is brushing her teeth or .... I will have another little body in a month to think about somewhere in this house or in my arms. I also keep thinking oh dear I better get a date in before we never go on dates again.
But...
I also keep dreaming of when I get to hold my little boy for the first time and see his tiny little fingers and toes and eyes and nose! I think about how there is going to be another little one in the car with me when we go places and how it will really feel like a family. I keep thinking of the walks that I'll take with him while lauren rides along on her bike and chats away to me while he smiles or sleeps...

The balance isn't shifting from good to bad... I'm just getting more.

I'm excited!! 17 days!!

Monday, June 7, 2010

It's a Boy

Thank You everyone for the congratulations!!! We really are so excited and the Ultrasound was fantastic! Here are some pictures of baby boys first photo shoot ;)



I know it is kinda hard to decipher these pictures for some but He's resting his elbow on his knee.



Here is little boy. I am so excited to have such wonderful docters who know exactly what they are looking for and how to tell me what they are looking for and I felt completely involved in the Ultrasound and I loved every second of it.

There were 11 posts and 5 said girl, 3 said boy. I didn't really think about it too hard but I have no baby boy stuff. A lot of baby girl stuff that I've tried over the years to go through but I just can't seem to part with some of those super adorable clothes.



Now for name picking. Any Suggestions? ;)

Monday, May 24, 2010



My new BFF.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Surprise!!!

Alright... Let me tell you a small story. It's a bit personal and I realize this but if you are comfortable being so personal with me... read on.

Dave and I got married 7 years ago. I was not the kid type. I am way more now that I have one but... So, I had no problem going to school, graduating and working for awhile. It just felt good to accomplish something so early in my life. Then, I started to get baby hungry, don't ask me how this happens to someone who was terrified of babies. Dave and I tried and thinking it was as easy as a wink, I was frustrated with waiting for a year for it to happen. I felt like something was wrong with me. But having patience kinda proves one a silly dilly. We got pregnant with Lauren and had our precious pea on the 4th of July of all days. (it fits her) She was early and I was freaking out... Pregnancy with her was a breeze and I only had one day that I felt sick, it was a good combo of a lot of things that did it to me. So when she came, it just felt surreal. I guess that describes becoming a parent right, surreal?

Off we three went to Virginia! Spent two wonderful years with friends and the water and the beautiful east coast. During this time... I got baby hungry again and we wanted to have another little one. But... if you have had to learn patience once... well doesn't mean you don't have to learn it more and even harder. Over two years ago Dave and I started trying again. We succeeded and failed a couple of times and all I have to say looking back at those really really really hard times, I am so blessed. The Lord was with me. He sent me a wonderful miracle when we were on our way (packing up in Virginia) to Utah, Dave needed to take a really hard end of rotation exam along with another exam for graduating. He happened to be with a great OB/GYN who was able to help me on such short notice and was so kind with my emotions. I felt so blessed with great friends who helped me on my way on a six day drive to Utah. Sigh. Dave and I succeeded again four months later. Super nervous about this, afraid that it would happen again I opened up to the wonderful wonderful friends around me who, honestly I feel I was blessed with not just to be friends with them, but I feel the Lord helped me have them in my life right then. I had such support when Dave was gone to Virginia getting ready to graduate and I was pretty much a wreck. But even when it was just Lauren and me and things really hit the fan... the Lord blessed me with a super sweet little girl that was more of a support than any two year old could be. She put her hand on me and said in that little sweet angel voice of hers," Mom why are you crying?" and I could barely muster out," because mommy has had a really bad day." she was quite for a bit and then said," It's okay mommy, it's going to be okay." I really feel I was blessed and the Lord showed he was there for me through the wonderful little and big people around me.

So after a break and a sigh and a recoup we thought well we got to get going again. And four months ago... well let's just say We are four months PREGNANT! Yeah!!! Hip Hip Hooray!! We kept our mouth closed so long because it just was very frustrating to say, "We're pregnant!! Yeah!" and then "Ummm not anymore" But here we are!!! And I can not tell you how grateful and happy and so overwhelmed with joy that this is happening! And the sound of that beautiful beautiful and wonderful heartbeat each and every time I hear it. Oh it's music to me. I cry every time i hear it. At the last check up this little one was kicking like crazy and it was the first time I could feel it. I laughed then cried. It's so wonderful!! Mothers day was kinda fun, I got an extra big kick during sacrament, kinda like Mommy I'm here Happy Mother's Day, love you. It's such a blessing and sure, I'm scared out of my pants to have a baby again but... nothing ever happens the same twice. And, as bad as I feel for saying this but not that I don't love Lauren more than my own air, I want this more than with Lauren. With Lauren I was mostly just unaware and scared. This feels good.

Lauren is pretty excited and she'll still have hard days (same as me) but she prays and says, "and thank you for my sister" and I just laugh because we don't know what we are having yet. She can't wait to help but, "not with the poopy diapers because they stink. ;)" Dave is excited too... I think he's afraid we will become miserably trapped like last time but... I hope we know how to handle things a bit better now. Dave thinks we are having a boy. He might be right... He was right with Lauren when I was wrong. I would love a little boy, and I would love a little girl... Honestly I would love either. I would love to have a boy because I just can't wait to have a sweet little boy of my own and for Dave to have a boy to do all those fun things that he can do with Lauren but... boys are different. I would love a little girl. Girls are so fun and Lauren would have a sister. Every girl out there with out a sister understands me. I would feel horrified if I didn't let Lauren have a sister. I can't control fate though so...

Here's the question... What do you think we are having?


Dave's parents and sister think we are having a boy. ;) I thought for sure we were having a girl at first. For sure! But now I call him a him. I felt like the heart beat was so clear and I have been sick but... I'm asking ya'll because it's just a fun game and we find out in two weeks :) Yeah!!

Well.... Surprise!!! We are pregnant and due in October! four days before my B-day ;) it will be a good present.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Easter Weekend


After our super fun visit and night at The Steve And Pamela Hotel, we went on the JEM trail with one of Dave's good friend from High school.This trail is by far my favorite, especially when you shuttle the uphill ;) I was so happy at the end of the trail because we were talking to a guy who had just finished the trail. He had a camera on his head and you could tell he was pretty good. He complimented me on taking the drops and said he saw a lot of girls and people walking them. I was so glad to hear that. Dave and Jarom are just way better than me so... anywho. It was a blast.


After a short hike and a good dinner in Zions we camped on Dave's new pads, they are as wonderful as he's let on to. Then when we woke up there was the Egg hunt. It was sooo fun to have two kids doing this. Plus it was kinda fun to set the eggs out. Lauren kinda made a good haul.


Here is Lauren just sulking on a rock. This girl, I have no idea why she was sulking but it kinda just cracks me up how much spice she has.


After we packed up camp, we went to hike Angels Landing. I'm glad I did it... but... it might be awhile since I do it again. It killed my knees and I'm pretty sure I strained my groin, yes i said groin. ;) This is the mountain we hiked. Yep, to that very tippy top.


This is part way up the hike. It was so beautiful. Dave had so much energy it was amazing. He packed Lauren 1/2 way up this trail. I know!!! I couldn't even keep up with him. It's the poles right?


Dave used his multipurpose poles, so cool I know it looks super old foagy, But.. I wished I had some. Plus people all the way up and down were saying things like, "hon, you take the guy out and I'll take his poles." I think I wasn't the only one wishing i had poles.


This was the switchbacks and they were steep!!!



This was one of the pictures Dave took and I edited over looking the peak. The last "half mile" is so not a half mile and it's really kinda scary. It just drops off and I just had to keep looking right infront of me. Plus it's kinda a climb. But... isn't this pretty?

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Holding Back.




I feel like I've cut myself out of some pretty cool things in life. You'd think I'd change... But, I really think I missed out in Norfolk. Granted I miss Norfolk horribly. It was such a good time in my life. But, It could have been so much better. All I needed to do was try to not hold myself back so much. I think people are afraid of getting hurt or rejected by others so they don't put themselves out there. When now that I look back, I just missed out on being friends with some really amazing people. I feel like I knew them... but I could have really enjoyed them. Such a sad scenario. And it's all because I didn't reach out when another did, or try to get myself into their lives. I think most of the time people like friends, so why was I so scared to be one?? I wonder if I should still try, via blogger or facebook to get close to these ladies from Virginia. But, maybe it's too late. I don't know.
So, I remember leaving Virginia and going to Denver and realizing this. Even as I was spending my last days in Virginia I couldn't reach out and become closer, silly me. So I went into Denver thinking, I might have a really great friend here. And I found four. Plus a whole crowd that I'm still getting to know. I was so boosted and uplifted and helped by these wonderful women. Friends are so important and gosh I'm so sad I've missed out. So... As I'm moving into another ward where it would be soooo easy to hide and think "They don't want to be my friend" I'm just going to give it a good head held high and smile.
P.s. if you are one of the ladies I'm talking about I just think ya'll are amazing and I love to learn from you.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Yea!!! It's sunny!!!

I'm so glad it's sunny outside! I just have to write it down. So, we are moving at the end of this week, into a rental. Bit frustrated about that but... it was our decision (I guess) And Lauren and I have felt like crap the past week and a half. Seriously throwing up all night, we take turns Lauren and I, barely able to eat during the day, completely crummy. Lauren's had serious Diarrhea, poor girl. While, those of you who have vacationed with me... know I get a little... backed up. So needless to say we don't pop out of bed like daises and rush to scrub walls and carpets and baseboards and ceilings and organize so when we unpack we don't hate life. Plus it had been so gray the past forever and I just have to thank the sun for showing it's beautiful self today. I honestly feel so much better. Still lightheaded and what not but I might actually be able to do something today, other than watch movies.